Friday, June 12, 2009

Regret

I've heard so many people declare that they have no regrets in life. There are tons of clever, uplifting quotes about it floating around in cyberspace. Sounds like a great way to live.



Dictionary.com defines it as a sense of loss, disappointment, dissatisfaction, or a feeling of sorrow or remorse for a fault, act, loss, disappointment, etc.



I'm talking about the feeling of remorse for an action. How can people NOT have that? To those of you who profess to live without regret, I have some questions. Have you never done anything that you wish you hadn't? Have you never broken the heart of a loved one? Have you never made a bad decision? Ever wished you'd gone to college or majored in something different? Never wished you hadn't married the ex? Never harmed an innocent person? If not, you're either lying, or you're a better person than I am.



I have many regrets. Do I let them dictate my life? No, but they're there. I don't wallow in the "coulda, shoulda, woulda's", but there are so many things that I wish I could go back and change. Some of them are just there in the past, but some seem to raise up and smack me on the head over and over. I'm not going to list them because it's a very personal issue for me. I just want you to stop and think about it.



How do you *really* live with no regret?

Monday, June 08, 2009

What are the boundaries of friendship?

Exactly what IS a friend?



From dictionary.com...
1. a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.
2. a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter.
3. a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile.



Synonyms:1. comrade, chum, crony, confidant. 2. backer, advocate. 4. ally, associate, confrere, compatriot.



As someone attached by feelings, a confidant, a *true* friend, where is the boundary on speaking freely? Is it ever okay to tell them things like, "You are such an incredibly intelligent woman, so how the fuck can you be so stupid??" or "How can you overlook the mountain of bullshit you've been fed for so long?" Or how about, "You have happiness sitting in front of you, and you're hell-bent on throwing it away with both hands." Can you tell them, "I love you, but you really need to quit whining, suck it up, and keep going."

Just thinking about a lot of things this morning after the screwed-up dreams I had all night.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

The past month has brought many changes with it, and I don't even know where to begin. Let's see...

I've started an online course in Medical Coding and Billing with http://www.careerstep.com/ and I'm using brain cells that have been asleep for way too long now. Hopefully my college A&P and Pharmacology courses will help me out when I get to that point. My crazy-ass medical history has already helped somewhat, and I've been enrolled for just a week now. I'd *like* to do the Medical Transcription course when I'm done with this, but we'll see how it goes.

We finally got ALL of the windows replaced in the house! Our utility bill has dropped to less than HALF what it was at this time last year. Amazing.

Little Matteo (see my previous post) has already been in the hospital and scared us all half to death. Poor thing was so jaundiced and couldn't maintain his body temp, but he's home and doing much better now.

One of my chosen sisters had back surgery and is still on the mend. She has a long road ahead, and I'll be right there every step of the way.

Breeze is graduating on TUESDAY. I still can't believe it. Poor thing better enjoy that day b/c she's having surgery the day after. We discovered what seems to be the source of a lot of her breathing problems...a SEVERELY deviated septum, so an outstanding ENT/Allergy specialist is going to fix her up.

Kat is coming home on Saturday! Woo Hoo! I'll finally have my family whole again under one roof. I just wish it were permanent, but I'm focusing on the positive. She's now a 10th grader!

Oh, and my dad, stepmom, and oldest nephew came to visit. My nephew is 15 and fell in love with Beaufort. :) He says he's moving here when he graduates. What's not to love? The beach, fishing, and a gorgeous little town full of charm.

My precious baby, Molly, (my new Dodge Nitro) already had to have a new windshield. :( Breeze and I were driving home from Charleston, and a rock hit the windshield. I was PISSED, but our insurance company rocks and had a tech out here asap to replace it. I'm happy, Molly's happy.

So that's life in a nutshell here. Someday, I'll post more regularly...maybe. ;)